Domestic Violence: When to Report it to the Police

Many people would agree that no act of domestic violence should go unreported, and that the police should be called after the first instance of domestic violence or abuse. This may have been reasonable in the past, but with recent changes in criminal laws, it may not be the best advice anymore. Although I believe that hitting is unacceptable under any circumstances, it may be wise to consider how best to handle such situations. 

Why Many Arguments Escalate to Domestic Violence

I might be called sexist for the following statement, but most instances of domestic violence are provoked by the woman, and I'm not the only one who thinks so. My wife, a family therapist who designed a family therapy court program here in Atlanta has told me that all of her cases began with the wife provoking the husband into a fit of anger, which results in a violent outburst. 

It is often the case that a poor decision in a moment of anger will result in a case of domestic violence. Many of these situations often lead to a call to 9-11 by the wife, and the husband ends up going to jail.

Why it's Important to Take a Moment Before Calling the Police

It used to be the case that a wife would call the police after a violent domestic dispute, the husband would be arrested, and then, once she'd calmed down and felt her point had been made, the wife would drop the charges and her husband would be released. Unfortunately, the rules have changed.

Today, when someone is arrested on charges of domestic violence, charges are automatically filed, and cannot be dropped. What this means is that many good marriages end up suffering severely due to an unusual fit of anger and poor decision making. 

When to Report Domestic Violence to the Police

The bottom line is this. If you're going to call the police for a case of domestic violence, you'd better mean it, and be prepared to deal with the legal issues that will follow. In cases where issues of domestic violence are repeated and cause injury or damage, then police intervention is likely necessary. It may be the "slap in the face" that someone needs to see the problem they have and to get help in the form of counseling and anger management help. 

However, don't make the mistake of calling the police out of anger or spite, because the police are often called unnecessarily, and should only be involved when really necessary.